|Posted by: ZahZsa||Posts: 1 - Joined: Thu Mar 25th, 2021 06:24 pm|
I thought I was okay. There was no doubt he had to stay with my ex, I moved out and went to my mother’s and she’s got a greyhound so I couldn’t bring him here. He’d just turned a year and a month old when I left. We got him at 4 months old. I knew it was a possibility I might break up with my partner, and we got him largely to help with my partner’s mental health. I like cats, but I’m more of a dog person, so I didn’t realise how hard I’d fall in love with the little furry bugger.
It’s a “trial separation” - which, to be honest, I can’t see resolving itself as my ex is still not taking sorting his mental health out seriously (it was emotionally abusive largely due to unresolved issues on his side). I spoke to him earlier - every time I speak to him on the phone I can hear the cat screaming because he can hear my voice. He loves his dad, but I was his “person” - he followed me from room to room and only ever hung out with my ex when I wasn’t available. My ex keeps saying he’s fine - but then also whinging about how demanding/hard work the cat is for one person (he’s a Somali - very playful and vocal - quite a bossy cat too). I feel like screaming every time he says it. I can’t afford a new place by myself right now so even if he’d let me I can’t suggest I take the cat for a bit.
I realised I was struggling to visualise him in my head (it’s only been a month), so watched some videos earlier - and haven’t stopped crying since. I miss him so so much. It feels like my heart is being ripped out of my chest.